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A child develops his/her sense of self and identity in the first three years of life and this becomes the template for the world/reality upon which all further experience are built. A multi generational history of relationship patterns will reveal these unconscious dynamics and how they were handed down from generation to generation. From this we can interrupt the repetition of these relational patterns and not hand them down to the next generation.
Marriage counseling includes couples and relationships of all kinds, including same sex, parents and kids, even friends, as well as employers and employees. All marriages or relationships can be repaired if both people want to stay in the relationship and are willing to take responsibility for their issues and do the hard work of repair. Most relationships are stronger after repair than they were before the injury or trauma occurred.
In the mid-twentieth century, family systems therapy was growing on both the East and West coasts of the US. It saw not the individual as having the problem (the identified patient), but the family system (systems theory). Therapists could then begin to work with all family members and all of their relationships with each other.
In previous times in utero life was unknown, but birth was much simpler. With more technology introduced, birth became less natural and the frequency of iatrogenic birth traumas increased even as infant birth deaths decreased. Today, we are able to see into the formerly unknown intrauterine life. We know that a mother shares substances (food and drink, drugs, alcohol, etc.) with the fetus through the same blood supply. This includes emotions, thoughts and stress hormones carried through brain chemistry. It is important that parents be aware of this during pregnancy and create a boundary between their thoughts and feelings while also bonding with the fetus.
"Dr. Rand's groundedness and ability to totally and compassionately listen to me and my fiance is beyond words (by the way we are both 72). From her life's experience she can empathize with the ingrained woes and feelings of futility between us.
He and I were high school sweethearts in the early '60s and happened to meet again a year ago with wonderful feelings toward each other. As it happened, we gradually found that our lifestyles and interests were at opposites sides of the spectrum. Dr. Rand has done what we thought would be an impossible, skillful task of walking us through seeing the light, helping us to see ourselves and each other as we truly are.
He and I have truly gone through rough patches manifesting the strong love we have despite the ingrained habits that we have been accustomed to. She allows us to embody our thoughts and obstacles and release old patterns."
"Until recently, no one has ever given us the tools and resources to deal with our personality differences, fears, emotions and how we react with one another.
We met Dr. Rand several weeks before our wedding and we now have a much more in depth understanding of one another - and how best to work together as a couple. Additionally, we are well equipped with an array of tools that will help us handle the many challenges marriage will bring.
I highly recommend Dr. Rand and her premarital counseling to all couples taking the steps towards marriage."